There's a lot about birth, that medical professionals, even the most well trained, obstetricians don't understand.
Audio Transcript Below (Please note this is auto-transcribed. I did my best to proof it, but apologize for any poor spelling/grammar).
You're listening to The VBAC podcast. I'm Jamie Zaki your host. I am a nurse doula, international board certified lactation consultant, mom of four and three time VBAC mama. If you are ready to overcome fear and take back control as you plan your VBAC, you are in the right place. Join me as we share inspiring Vback story, learn how to overcome fear and deep dive on common questions about VBAC
This is a disclaimer that any of the information experiences, opinions and stories told on this podcast are with the intention of inspiring educating and informing parents. This information is not intended to treat or diagnose any medical conditions. If you have questions, you must consult your provider. Jamie Zaki does not accept liability for any decisions that you make.
After listening to this podcast,
Today's episode is brought to you by the VBAC with Confidence Complete Birth Preparation Program, an on demand course that helps you connect with your inner womanly intuition, strengthen your ability to advocate for yourself and learn the power and surrender use code MAMABEAR2022 to save on enrollment.
I am so excited to be here with you guys today on today's episode of the VBAC podcast, I'm gonna go ahead and just introduce myself so you can get to know me a little better.
We're gonna talk about why the VBAC conversation is so important and why I am so passionate about this topic. And at the end, I am gonna leave you with my wishes for you.
So my name is Jamie and I am a mama four. My first born was a C-section due to breech presentation. And I thought I knew a lot about birth because I was a nurse.
So to me, it was like, I've learned all the medical things I need to learn about birth. Of course, I know what's gonna happen. I understand how this industry works, so I'm gonna get my way and everything's gonna be just fine. And it did not happen that way at all. I was in for a very rude awakening. And I found out that there's a lot about birth that I didn't know. There's a lot about birth that medical professionals, even the most well trained, obstetricians don't understand.
And that is nothing against them. It's just to say that birth is such an amazing experience and process that is designed so miraculously, that there is nothing that we, as humans can do to fully understand and control birth. It's just something that is completely outside of our control.
So my first birth ended in a very traumatic C-section and the frustrating thing for me is it didn't have to be that way, right?
Like I could have, first of all, I didn't have to have a C-section realistically speaking. I didn't know my options. I wasn't given many options. I'll share my birth story with you guys another day, but I, I didn't have to have a C-section and then, okay. We had a C-section, it didn't have to be traumatic, but it was, it was because I didn't know how to advocate for myself. I had a team that did not respect my wishes, a team that was focused on policy versus just using a little bit of critical thinking and compassion.
I had a team that lacked compassion. So I was left vulnerable with no support. And it really put me into this really negative spiral, this fear cycle that just spiral and things happen. And I shut down more and it became a very traumatizing experience unnecessarily. And the sad thing is, I know my story is all too common.
So I went on to have three VBACs after that. One was in the hospital, my son was nine pounds, four ounces. He was born after 36 hours of labor and a compound hand, I had an amazing birth team and I really had a great experience. Um, but there were still a lot of things about that experience that I was not okay with. So fast forward to my third pregnancy, my daughter, um, I was in a new state, had different options available to me and I decided I wanted to have a home birth.
And unfortunately, the state I was in did not support home birth for VBAC moms, even though I had already had a successful VBAC. So I found a hospital based midwifery practice that I really liked and decided to go with them. But as the pregnancy drew to an end, I really felt called to this home birth.
So we took some chances and made it happen. And during her pregnancy, something that really stuck with me was I was kind of forced to meet with an MFM doctor. And this doctor told me that I could only have a VBAC if it was not at home, if it was in a hospital. And if this baby was in the perfect position and if this baby wasn't any bigger than my last baby, my last baby being a nine pound four ounce baby.
And I thought to myself, I VBACd him with no problem. Why should I not be able to do it again? And he made this really big deal about her size, and he really pushed me to get a growth scan done, to see if she'd be the right size for VBAC. And I was like, you know, no, I'm good. Thanks. I'm good.
And so then like her size kind of stuck with me. It was a concern for like a long time, because my first born was eight pounds, four ounces. That was my C-section baby. Then my VBAC baby was nine pounds, four ounces. And we were joking that she would be 10 pounds, four ounces. And then he planted this little seed of like, if this baby's bigger, but everybody was like, there's no way this baby's bigger. Like midwives would like palpate and everything. I didn't show for a while. Everyone's like, there's no way..... when she was born, she was 10 pounds, four ounces.
And so I kind of showed everybody like, you know what? You can VBAC a big baby at home with no medicine. And I am certain that if I had her in the hospital, she would've been another C-section again, I'll share that story some other time.
And then I had my fourth baby, my third VBAC, another 10 pound, four ounce baby in my bedroom.
So I am so passionate about this topic because I personally have experienced that feeling of helplessness that comes with planning a Vbac. the fears that come with planning a Vbac. and every single time, even though I had done it before, there were so many voices telling me how reckless it was to have a Vbac how dangerous it was to have a home birth and how impossible it would be for me to birth a large baby vaginally.
Now you guys can't see me, but I'm all of five foot, three inches tall, 130 pounds before my pregnancies. Like I'm not a big person. My husband is five, six, not a big person. We are not big people. I did not have gestational diabetes and I have these huge babies.
So for me to be able to birth these large babies with all the odds stacked against me, really taught me something about myself, something about the birth industry and something about how God created us.
And now of course my experience is just that my experience, but I learned that there's a lot that we can do that people are gonna tell us we can't do, but we can. So I'm here to inspire you and encourage you to make your decisions from a place of information and intuition, not from a place of fear, whether that's your fears or somebody else's fears, I'm here to help you make confident decisions that you can stand firm in.
This has nothing to do with being stubborn. Although like that's a part of it. I guess it takes a certain kind of personality to have that resolve, to push back against the voices.
But it is about making the best decisions for you and your family based off the information you have and your intuition, it's about not being bullied. And that's why I wanted to start this podcast because I want to share with you guys common questions, common fears, let you know, you are not alone, but give you a different perspective of how to look at it. I supported moms as a doula as they plan their Vbacks and go through this cycle of fear and having to advocate for themselves and kind of panic at the last minute, when everything seems to be going against 'em and then they pull it off, they do it because they get focused on their goal and they remind themselves of the truth, the truth of what they are capable of the truth, that fear does not control us and the truth that they are well informed enough to make the best decision for them.
So that's what this podcast is about. That's what we are going to celebrate. We're going to celebrate our intuition. I'm going to teach you guys about my three pillars of confidence, the womanly intuition, womanly wisdom, uh, self-advocacy skills and the beauty and power that comes with surrendering. We're gonna learn all of that over the next few episodes. And my wishes for you are to find peace and confidence in your pregnancy with your previous birth, with your C-section, come to peace with your C-section and have a peaceful, positive birth experience after C-section.
If you are planning a Vbac, I am here to champion you and support you. And I am not going to blow, smoke up your butt. I am going to clap my hands. I'm going to cheer you one, but I'm going to let you know that there will be times that things go wrong.
That things don't go the way you hoped or planned. And we can still find peace in that that is part of taking control is that we know we have controlled everything that we can, we don't have to worry about our decisions anymore. We just have to accept that some things are outside of our control. And when we can accept that and surrender to that, we can have a better birth experience. I'm so excited to be here with you. I hope that you guys join me to learn more.
Thank you so much for joining me on this week's episode of the Vback podcast. If you liked what you heard, please go ahead and leave a review to let other mamas know it's worth a listen. If you have any questions, you'd like me to feature in my upcoming Q and a episode, click the show notes to submit your questions. And if you haven't checked it out yet, grab instant access to my free combating fear during VBA class available. Now, hope to see you next week when we will be talking about whether or not VBA is the right option for.